So it's been awhile. Sue me. My life has been pretty full lately. I have been served the papers of my divorce, finally. There is a good chance things on that front will be done this year. School has been hectic. I've been trying to decide whether or not to attend graduation, but since the deadline was today, I guess I'm not going. I have been hitting the meat of my classes so things there have been steadily eating my time. In the next few weeks I have two presentations, three major papers, and a few tests, needless to say, I'm busy there as well. It seems, however, that both of my readers want some new stuff. Well never let it be said that I don't aim to please.
My mother has been reading one of those self help books for women that claims to reveal the secret of how men think. As far as I can tell it's not too far off. The problem with that whole thing is that a woman could never completely get it, nor could a man communicate it effectively to a woman.
The woman who writes the book says that women make their men feel inadequate. I can agree with that. I know a woman who complains that her husband never completes a project around the house. I asked her when the last time she thanked him for doing a project. She replied that she always thanks him for doing the project. The problem, as I see it, is that nobody ever hears her talk about how she likes what he does. Everybody hears her complain, over and over again ad infinitum, about how he never finishes. He doesn't quite get all of the baseboard done, or he didn't get the cover put back on the lamp, or he left the knob only partially attached.
While this may indeed be frustrating, perhaps he is frustrated with how she tells everybody how inadequate she finds his home repair to be. She doesn't see it like that, but my men-sense tingles with it. She is constantly bringing this man down in his own eyes and the eyes of his peers. It is quite possible that this guy would die of shock if he ever did something and she didn't find something to fault in it.
It is not that this woman is ungrateful, yet that is how it seems to us men. It is that she can't shut up about the one thing that bothers her. It is the equivalent of a man going through 40 years of life and never telling his wife that he loves her. The one things she wants from him and she doesn't ever get it.
The one thing that this man wants, I would bet, is to have his wife not complain about something he did. For her, just once, to talk about how great what he did was without talking about what he didn't do right. I hear this all the time. How many times have you heard someone say 'It's great, but...'. That is the problem. For someone you love there should be no 'buts'.
Well that's it. I hope you liked it. I will attempt to write more as time goes on, but do not expect me to fill with memes and lists and crap like that. I try hard not to do them. I really love all you readers, but...
My mother has been reading one of those self help books for women that claims to reveal the secret of how men think. As far as I can tell it's not too far off. The problem with that whole thing is that a woman could never completely get it, nor could a man communicate it effectively to a woman.
The woman who writes the book says that women make their men feel inadequate. I can agree with that. I know a woman who complains that her husband never completes a project around the house. I asked her when the last time she thanked him for doing a project. She replied that she always thanks him for doing the project. The problem, as I see it, is that nobody ever hears her talk about how she likes what he does. Everybody hears her complain, over and over again ad infinitum, about how he never finishes. He doesn't quite get all of the baseboard done, or he didn't get the cover put back on the lamp, or he left the knob only partially attached.
While this may indeed be frustrating, perhaps he is frustrated with how she tells everybody how inadequate she finds his home repair to be. She doesn't see it like that, but my men-sense tingles with it. She is constantly bringing this man down in his own eyes and the eyes of his peers. It is quite possible that this guy would die of shock if he ever did something and she didn't find something to fault in it.
It is not that this woman is ungrateful, yet that is how it seems to us men. It is that she can't shut up about the one thing that bothers her. It is the equivalent of a man going through 40 years of life and never telling his wife that he loves her. The one things she wants from him and she doesn't ever get it.
The one thing that this man wants, I would bet, is to have his wife not complain about something he did. For her, just once, to talk about how great what he did was without talking about what he didn't do right. I hear this all the time. How many times have you heard someone say 'It's great, but...'. That is the problem. For someone you love there should be no 'buts'.
Well that's it. I hope you liked it. I will attempt to write more as time goes on, but do not expect me to fill with memes and lists and crap like that. I try hard not to do them. I really love all you readers, but...
